Obligatory Photo Collage

Vacation... Vacation.. Montageeeeeeeeeee
Vacation... Vacation.. Montageeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Sing sing sing were on a trip
no need to give lip
its a Vacation... its a Vacation
no time to make idle observations

Here is a composite picture
the main star of our feature.
Enjoy!!


(Myrtle 2003, Jersey Shore 2001, Wendy's Jelly Bean Quest 2001)

"The Gates" Central Park February 2005

Just as I'm assured if you can rhyme it Pauly Shore can ruin it for that fact if its put on celluloid he can ruin it, Jury Duty, Bio-Dome, and many other early ninety epics that inspired a generation of fine actors like Matthew Lliard, Freddie Prinze Jr. and others. Well the opposite can be said about Christos and his very post-op tranny wife and their energizing affect upon a another dreary winter month bringing more energy then a gay-man on mocha latte with an unlimited budget in bed bathe and beyond. The gates roamed through the park like an orange dragon looking for General Tsao chicken but finding only an empty carton and Michael Moore licking wanton soup off a wife beater as GW Jr. says o yeah that’s how papi likes it. The picture really brings you the sense of joy that the gates brought to nyc, in this miserable time of year, the period of dread after xmas and before spring warmth.

Just as audience of Jury Duty the people of NYC do their best to enjoy a bad situation I guess not completely like Jury Duty this is just cold weather not Pauly Shore trying to act. Keep in mind this people realize war is an invention of man and that you can’t hug your kids with nuclear arms, so they do the best they can resisting their normal instinct to parlay these bastards into a week in Cabo, Mexico, rather they take them ice skating. If you look closely you can see future Nancy Kerrigan’s and Tonya Harding’s as parents torment their little bundles of joy into a life of being professional ice princesses. Just remember when you blow off skating practice because you were stone is hurting more then just you it hurts the ones you love. Luckily for these parents their little meal tickets haven’t met Pablo at the Bodega just yet. So Harsh said lets watch them ice skate and laugh as they fall, as we watched on we realized the main reason for ice skating is adults to laugh at kids falling and it was truly glorious, take a moment to laugh with me hahahahahaahaha, now repent just say it was a one time thing, just like Michael Jackson with those little kids.

Sachi shows the world yes brown men can jump just not that high. As Sachi (El Gato) Desai jumped he realized that he should get in the business of kicking your ass, business would be good, business would be me being in your business, I need to get on a sit-com. Slowly the Van Halen song Jump fills the air, Jump ahhhhhhhhhh, now sing with me….

Striking his best GQ pose Harsh “H-Bomb” Patel (earned the nickname H Bomb by being an enforcer for the Genovese crime family) he ponders if the pose would be enhanced with a faux hawk similar to the great Ryan Cabrera. Then he joins us back out of his subconscious and joins the now with the look of what am I doing here, why am I here, why are these cotton boxers chaffing me? Finally the smile hints that he doesn’t care cause he just found some M&M’s in his coat pocket an everything is Gold. A moment later the look of despair comes across his face once the cameras are off our star H Bomb and El Gato asks what sup, he says what will happen to Piazza with a designated hitter in the NL………………

Finally El Gato showing no regard for his fellow Gates goer, and saying up yours to Christos he takes a timely leak over central park captured on film by the immortal Mr. H bomb. Moments later the two were apprehended by park security who asked the poignant question “What the fuck do you think your doing?” I clearly explained it was an illusion and the liquid was nothing more then fine Evian water that El Gato and H-Bomb were using to nurse a poor squirrel back to health. At this point H-Bomb transformed to Harsh and using his cognitive skills of reason and law know how explained to them to stop harassing his client i.e. me, well to cut a long story short, we were beaten and incarcerated for 24hours. If in trouble and no body can help call the A-Team ….. ( I wish I remembered this)…

Now everyone sing the Twisted Sister classic we're not gonna take it we're not gonna take it...